Posts Tagged ‘‘G.I.’

G.I. Joe: Retaliation – Pre Order Now – Release Date July 30, 2013

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G.I. JOE: RETALIATION BLU RAY 2013 NEW RELEASE FREE WORLDWIDE SHIPPING THE ROCK

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G.I. Joe: The Movie (DVD, 2000) new sealed original release r1 kid rhino

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G.I. Joe: Retaliation — $41.2M

Veteran dance-film director Jon Chu takes a crack at G.I. Joe in this sequel to Stephen Sommers’ blockbuster 2009 film. Dwayne Johnson stars as Roadblock in the sequel, with Channing Tatum returning as Duke, the leader of the Joes, and Ray Park joining them as mute ninja Snake Eyes. Bruce Willis, Ray Stevenson, Adrianne Palicki, Jonathan Pryce, Lee Byung-hun, Elodie Yung, and RZA co-star. ~ Jeremy Wheeler, Rovi [more]

‘G.I. Joe: Retaliation’ stills

Dwayne Johnson, Channing Tatum and Bruce Willis suit up for this sequel to the 2009 action blockbuster 

‘G.I. Joe 2′ Actually Delayed Because Paramount Wants More Channing Tatum

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Just a week ago, Paramount announced plans to bump this summer’s G.I. Joe: Retaliation to next March–a delay the studio claimed they would use constructively “to do a conscientious 3D job because we’ve seen how it can better box office internationally,” which made some sense, because studios do indeed love charging people more for 3D tickets. But what if I were to tell you that was all part of a massive cover-up meant, as one insider put it, “to not reveal the Tatum of it all”? Then it’s kind of funny, isn’t it? Because who says that?

According to sources who talked to both Deadline and THR, Paramount’s delay has less to do with 3D than it does with fear that their movie is sort of bad and, in a film first, needs more Channing Tatum.

Though the trailers for the G.I. Joe sequel have made it look marginally better than its predecessor, evidently the film is not testing well with audiences, who have reportedly been giving it scores ranging from “mediocre to bad.” The one part test audiences did get behind? The faint tendon of friendship that initially connects the muscles of The Rock and Channing Tatum. Unfortunately, Paramount didn’t know anyone would like that part (this was before The Vow and 21 Jump Street made Tatum’s dumbfounded look so recognizable), and, as it’s cut now, the film sees Tatum die almost immediately. Spoiler.

Seeing how Retaliation would be going up against Magic Mike, which has arguably too much of Channing Tatum, and The Amazing Spider-Man, which has Spider-Man, the studio decided it best to do reshoots with more Tatum, make it 3D while they’re at it, and save their film until next year, when it can be released with less competition and severely deadened expectations. As for why studio executives previously stated the delay was entirely due to 3D conversion, they’re just embarrassed to admit how much they like Channing Tatum’s belly muscles, okay?

You Can’t Play with Your New G.I. Joes Until Next March

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So much escalating excitement over the slow realization, “oh, they made another G.I. Joe… with Bruce Willis?” and now it won’t see a payoff for another ten months. Paramount has delayed G.I. Joe: Retaliation until March 29, 2013 so that they have time to make it more 3D, and thus make a bunch more money off it.

As a studio executive explained to Deadline, “We’re going to do a conscientious 3D job because we’ve seen how it can better box office internationally.” Lest anyone worry that adding post-production 3D as an afterthought is somehow a poor decision, the executive added, “Jim Cameron did all of Titanic‘s 3D in post – and look how well that movie turned out,” which is a fair point. What is G.I. Joe: Retaliation if not Titanic set against the historical drama of The Rock’s pecs?

New ‘G.I. Joe: Retaliation’ Trailer: Joes Betrayed, Bruce Willis Orders Some Thin Mints

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This latest trailer for G.I. Joe: Retaliation wastes little time in explaining why Joe star Channing Tatum was so absent from the last trailer for the film. As the preview–and presumably the actual film–opens, the entire G.I. Joe action figure line is attacked by the U.S.’s own forces, taking out the majority of the team, Tatum included. More likely it will turn out Tatum is alive in the hospital or something, leaving the team in the hands of a new leader for but one movie, because that formula worked well enough for Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel. But as far as why The Rock is now seemingly leader of a Wayans-free Joe team, that’s why.

As for why the Joes were attacked, it’s because Cobra has wrested control of the White House, and not even in the polite way lobbyists do it. Thanks to the shape-shifting powers of Arnold Vosloo, Cobra has literally taken over the presidency, placing themselves in power and turning the surviving G.I. Joe figures into criminals. Finding it tough to hide out when half their team is composed of an enormous, shorn man and the personification of a black dildo, the Joes turn to the only man they can trust: G.I. Joe himself, Bruce Willis, who seems to have contributed a few wisecracks on the condition that he be allowed to shoot them all in sequence in front of a green screen. Willis grants the Joes use of that super awesome tank vehicle your parents refused to buy you because they already bought you the Turtle Blimp for your birthday, and, well, now The Rock has one less pithy quip he can use in Fast Six:

Now, I’m fuzzy on some of my G.I. Joe canon, but did Firefly always take his name to such a literal extreme, or is this something new since the advent of Michael Bay’s invention of little CGI robot bugs?

Also, if it turns out Tatum just got his head clonked and now he’s working for Cobra because of brain damage, eff off, because that’s just The Vow again but with the roles switched and with larger political implications.

‘G.I. Joe: Retaliation’ Character Posters: Here Are the Actors Pretending To Be Toys

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From across mankind’s internet–specifically, across IGN, HeyUGuys, CloneWeb, /Film, JoBlo, Collider, ComingSoon, and Yahoo–here is the full set of character posters for the summer’s most anticipated militant action figure movie, G.I. Joe: Retaliation. All your favorites are here: metal face, ninja, dignified Bruce Willis, Channing Tatum, guy who is shirtless but is somehow not Channing Tatum, solemn Rock–plus, girls! See them all larger below.

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Hey, fire! Cool!(?)

‘G.I. Joe: Retaliation’ Character Posters: Here Are the Actors Pretending To Be Toys

gi-joe-retaliation-character-posters.jpg

From across mankind’s internet–specifically, across IGN, HeyUGuys, CloneWeb, /Film, JoBlo, Collider, ComingSoon, and Yahoo–here is the full set of character posters for the summer’s most anticipated militant action figure movie, G.I. Joe: Retaliation. All your favorites are here: metal face, ninja, dignified Bruce Willis, Channing Tatum, guy who is shirtless but is somehow not Channing Tatum, solemn Rock–plus, girls! See them all larger below.

gi-joe-retaliation-01.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-02.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-03.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-04.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-05.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-06.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-07.jpg

gi-joe-retaliation-08.jpg

Hey, fire! Cool!(?)