Posts Tagged ‘Dumb’

Happy Birthday, America, You Fat Dumb Bastard

In honor of America’s proud tradition of making things go “BOOM” to celebrate our independence from a country that far surpasses us in health care, education, gun control, you name it, The Superficial will be off today because a paid holiday’s a paid holiday no matter whose bullshit birthday it is. (What’s up, Jesus?) So we’ll be back Monday, but if you hate your friends, family, or just human contact in general, you can check out our possibly more industrious link partners below and/or dick around with me on Facebook and Twitter where I’m sure I’ll be after my parents bring up Hobby Lobby, and I respond by shoving a live M-80 in my face. #USA

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‘Dumb and Dumber’ Sequel Loses Principal Dumb Guy

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Well, despite Peter Farrelly’s claim Dumb and Dumber 2 would shoot this September, it now seems the film won’t be excruciatingly emptying itself into theaters. Also, it turns out the title wasn’t Dumb and Dumber 2; it was Dumb and Dumber To, so correct your notes.

Marking what would be the first time a studio has dismissed a belated, ill-conceived sequel put in front of them, New Line and Warner Bros. reportedly showed little enthusiasm for the project, which ETOnline claims made star Jim Carrey grow “increasingly frustrated” until he finally left the project. Confirming their story while somehow indicating the title’s hilarious spelling, Carrey added:

“I would have thought Dumb and Dumber To was a no-brainer, after all it’s implied in the title.”

Assumedly, the actor’s departure means an end to the project, as the Farrellys already made clear the sequel had always been contingent on Carrey’s most annoying sound in the world squealing in concert with Jeff Daniels’ diarrhea. But the good news is, now Lauren Holly’s fall schedule is definitely open if Kelsey Grammer wants to kickstart another Down Periscope.

‘Love Connection Mash-Up’ Will Show Those Dumb Androids What They’re Missing

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The guy behind the violent, action-packed Confrontation Mash-Up has returned with a new edit with essentially the opposite focus: love! Though, really, the opposite of “confrontation” is more like “cowardly surrender,” so hopefully editor Patrick Peris will get around to putting that together, too. Milksops forever!

(Note: things start to get a little not-safe-for-work around 1:30, when your chances of seeing a humping Robert De Niro escalate quickly.)

(Thanks, Patrick!)

‘Clifford the Big Red Dog’ Becoming Big Dumb Movie

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The company behind The Lorax has decided it’s time to make a Clifford without the involvement of a juvenile Martin Short.

As foretold by The Hollywood Reporter, Illumination Entertainment and Universal Entertainment are teaming to put together a feature-length adaptation of children’s book series-turned PBS cartoon Clifford the Big Red Dog. Bedtime Stories writer Matt Lopez has been hired to plot out when and what Clifford will crush, and the plan is to mix sheepish, live-action actors and massive, talking CGI dog into a vermilion pap ideal for those looking for a new flavor of Marmaduke. As the THR story notes, “The character is a big brand in the children’s world, representing friendship and a role model,” but we’ll see how much of a role model he remains once the film comes around to heavily imply just how hilariously big and stinky CGI Clifford’s turds are.

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