Posts Tagged ‘crap’

The Crap We Missed – Friday 8.1.14

On account of Fish and I bailing to go see a matinee of Guardians of the Galaxy like two strong, straight, sports-loving American men are wont to do, here’s your insanely early and hastily tossed together The Crap We Missed, because if I know one thing, it’s that I need to get the large pretzel bites, because I’ll ask him if he’s going to have any, he’ll say no, but then when I get the small, next thing I know half of them are gone and I’ll say “Why didn’t you just get your own?” and he’ll be all “You can just say I’m fat, I know that’s what you’re thinking.” and he’ll post a “feeling depressed” status with no message explaining it to his FB page and just sulk for the entire movie you guys get totally pissed if you have to wait a whole weekend to find out Seal‘s new lady is into assplay.

Catch you on Monday, real jobbers,

- Photo Boy

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Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 7.29.14

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which pretty much wouldn’t have happened without Instagram boobs and an unhealthy (and I’m just now noticing incestuous…maybe I should swap out that pic, oh look, beer!) injection of Brazilian ass. It’s like a Frankenstein monster of all things Internet, but without cat photos, unless you count Fat Rob Kardashian as cat photos, which now that I’ve suggested it should definitely be the new thing.

Could you imagine him trying to jump onto a table, but missing slightly and falling off? OHMYGOD or, or curling up in Khloe‘s mouth and just falling asleep?!ADORBS!!!!1

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Friday 7.25.14

The Crap We Missed where it’s just another day, another embarrassing, drunk public appearance for Kiefer Sutherland. This guy needs some new material. We’ve also got Vin Diesel basking in his almost non-speaking role in which he’s rendered completely unrecognizable with CG effects, Ireland Baldwin at the bottom of the Republicans’ dreaded slippery slope, and Queen Elizabeth who just knows this bitch is about to take her phone out and start texting through this whole thing.

Seriously, there should be laws against these people,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 7.24.14

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed that finds two of New York’s favorite sons out on their best behavior, with Alec Baldwin fraternizing with the homeless and Shia Labeouf actually wearing a clean-looking suit to court. Are they turning a new leaf, or should I keep making flagrantly irresponsible assumptions about two men I know nothing about based on a single candid photo? What I will definitely do, however, is proudly offer up this damning piece of evidence I’ve patiently waited for, so I can finally nail Joe Jonas‘ ass.

*submits to Fish for copy-editing, comes back all clear, clicks Publish*

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

Holy Crap! This Is Epic! You’ll Never Need Another Cooler Again!

First thing first, this is the Coolest! Literally!

Want a cooler that’s so much more cooler than a normal cooler? Then do we have the cooler for you!

SRSLY! This cooler has an 18k battery, a bluetooth speaker, a USB charger, an LED light, a gear tie down…

(taking a breath)

…a cool divider/cutting …

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 7.10.14

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed, our daily feature of butts and whatever clever method (Today, it’s Jumbotron Penis-Smush™) Gerard Butler‘s using to get chicks into a closet-sized latrine. Yes, that last thing can be counted on daily, so in other words, there’s a recipe here. You start with a quarter cup of “Wait, how does Lindsay Lohan not look like she’s dying a meth-related death here?” Then just a dash of “Yep, I can definitely see Fergie‘s wife‘s penis through this bunny suit.” Toss all that into a flaky “HA! Rob Ford‘s smiling — HE’S SO HIGH!!” and you’ve got yourself TCWM.

Find this and other mindless brain-rot food right here, only at The Superficial!

- Photo Boy

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Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Thursday 7.3.14

Alright everybody, it’s your last The Crap We Missed before we celebrate America’s birthday by passing out drunk on top of the grill before the escorts even get there. What, you don’t like to barbeque? So, I managed to put together another hearty selection of essentially innocent celebrity candids for us all to project shameful, humiliating and albeit completely untrue scenarios onto. Yay, Internets! With that in mind, here’s back-to-back Kelly Brook shots that I almost felt guilty about until I remembered my soul died circa 1993, Lily Allen‘s stomach because see previous and the inevitable outcome of all that Jersey Shore bullshit that we waited patiently for.

They actually look so depressed they might kill themselves! Happy Fourth of July Everyone!!

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 7.2.14

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where we’re still holding strong with another robust gallery this holiday week, so stay tuned, because tomorrow I’m pretty sure we’re going to run our ninth update on the Kendra Wilkinson story after she trips over her own foot in front on her way into the airport which clearly indicates her husband’s penchant for paying to jerk people off. *uses Bachelor’s degree to wipe Manwich off face* So until then, please enjoy shiny new lesbian Ireland Baldwin in a bikini and the rest of the pictures that you’re now voraciously clicking through after following that link straight into an FBI database.

/r/CondomsAndZima,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Monday 6.23.14

Welcome to Monday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Prince Harry in a completely innocent photo that I’m in no way using as a subtle suggestion to Fish about the summer vacation he always talks about, but we never get around to taking. YOUR LIES CUT DEEP, YOU KNOW THAT?! We’ve also got Justin Bieber and the Ghost of Douchemas Future, Donnie Wahlberg‘s petrified stare as the realization that no, those titties weren’t worth it after all finally sets in, and Brooke Mueller dragging the hellspawn through LAX, so if you needed a diversion, Al Qaeda, security will never be more tied up than right now.

List? You really think we weren’t on some type of list already? HA! You guys..

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

The Crap We Missed – Friday 6.20.14

Welcome to Friday’s The Crap We Missed where Kevin Hart actually fell for the old “Hey bro, can we get a selfie?” before being arrested for obstructing the sidewalk, having drugs planted on him, and being tossed in jail because NYC is so clean and family friendly everybody, bring the kids! And speaking of kids, meet Apollo Rossdale, my new personal hero for his valiant effort to try to show me Gwen Stefani‘s boob. Almost kid, almost. When you can perfectly edit farts into my favorite terrible action movies, you’ll have my vote for President, I promise.

You and the boobie paint girl. Ok, you might have to be her VP, you understand,

Click Here To Start The Gallery

- Photo Boy

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

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