Posts Tagged ‘2010’

Sun, sex and blood boasts the tag line of this 3D gore and smut fest, but what does Hag Films exclusive film critic, Professor Stephen Hawking think about it? Wait no longer. 33DD fun. Kelly Brook plays a porn star, swims naked, then gets gnawed to the bone by hungry prehistoric piranhas, with cameos from Christopher Lloyd and Richard Dreyfuss revisiting Hooper from Jaws and hot babes in bikinis not forgetting gore galore…. Hello. I’m Professor Steven Hawk in, and this is my movie review for Piranha 3D. I just saw it last night down at the Odeon, and apart from being attacked by a black man in the foyer, i had an enjoyable evening. If jaws didn’t teach you that drunk and stoned, skinny dipping sluts will meet a gruesome end, then Piranha 3D will for sure. Its a modern remake to Joe Dante’s 1978 Jaws rip off, and its abysmal sequel Piranha The spawning by James Cameron, of Avatar and Terminator fame. He’s come a long way hasn’t he? French director Alexandre Aja takes the helm to revisit and revamp the B-movie for the modern teen age – gore and 3D generation. Sea, sex, and blood boasts the tagline and lets face it, that’s the only reasons we’re watching it. We’re certainly not watching it for the characters, which are so familiar they could have acted themselves, which was a good job as the actors didn’t seem to be up to the job. Just look sexy guys – just look sexy!! The story takes place on amity island – no, sorry, my bad, it takes place at lake Victoria – a quiet town …
Video Rating: 5 / 5